Struggling not to be "that mama"

 I have waited my entire life to take this picture!  The idea of passing on one of my greatest passions to my children and watching them enjoy it as much as I do has flooded my mind for a VERY long time. 

 So you can imagine how excited I was to sign up my 4yr old for a week long soccer camp, how tears ran down my face at the joy of seeing this little guy all geared up - his excitement when we got there...

 Then I realized maybe we should have signed him up for football.  He kinda liked it the first day, then a little less the second day

By day three I could barley get him to participate.  My parent's were even there to help out and watch their budding World Cup player.....and we all struggled with it!  I think I especially struggled b/c Stephen is such and energetic active little guy and to watch him walk off the pitch and come sit down with me and refuse to play was very hard! 

I did everything I could to hold back the inner athlete that wanted nothing more than to say "suck it up little guys, get out there and work hard!"  But then I realized he was only 4!!!!  I realized that this might not be his thing, or that it was WAY to much for him, and I needed to not be "that mama" that pushed things on him!!! 

As my father reminded me, when my big brother was 4 or 5 he would hide matchbox cars in his soccer uniform and pull them out in the middle of a game and play cars on the pitch! LOL I can so see this happening.  So Alan and I are holding back that inner coach, telling ourselves it doesn't matter what he is passionate about - just that we pray he finds something he is and we will support that! 

The beauty of reality!

 Sometimes, you just don't need any words :) (which is a very difficult thing for me)

But these cute ups and downs are my awesome, wonderful, miraculous life!  Happy Thursday!

Things happen so quickly around here!

So I have to apologize, I truly wanted to have a post up much sooner, but things happen around here quicker then I can document them!

After writing the last post I read all the comments - thank you so much for your thoughts!  We moved Abby into Stephen's room in a pack and play and the twins into one crib in the nursery.....

That didn't last long!  On the second morning I woke up to find Abby out of the pack n play..... then I got worried she would climb out and get hurt. So I made the call to Alan that he needed to go by the storage unit on his way home and get the other bed - it was time!

That night, I sat in the nursery, nursing a baby and Alan started putting the bed together, all I could hear was little Abby - "I help you daddy? This my bed? You build my bed daddy?"  So stinkin cute, she really got into it!

The excitement continued, it ended up being a little later night then usual, but that was ok

Abby was truly pumped when she saw her princess sheets that she picked out all by herself!!  She was so happy

Then Stephen began demonstrating what was going to happen when we closed the door and said goodnight

It was an interesting evening for sure!  Abby started the evening crying and saying she was scared :(  We tried to lay down with her, but that was just a party for them; then it turned into a party.  (After the crying I was very happy to hear the laughing) Then I think around 10:30 that night we stopped hearing the laughing and giggling.  At 1am I found Abby sleeping under her bed :)

 Then we started to notice that the twins were waking up a bit more than usual (which is really hard to do) - why might you ask? well, someone seemed to be kicking the other one in the head!  Really cute actually, I would put them down on opposite sides of the crib, then when I heard them crying they both would have wiggled to the center towards each other!  But they unfortunately where waking each other up. 

I made the call to our dear friends Lauren and Dan Johnson, who have so wonderfully let us borrow their crib!!!  Alan had another bed putting together evening, and just like that our house is wall to wall beds! :) 

Just in case you're wondering, the evenings have gotten better with Stephen and Abby - they do giggle and play for a bit before falling asleep, but I'm all for that bonding!  They are becoming best best friends for sure! :)

Thanks again!

what to do??

Aunt Lisa came for a visit to get some loving from her nieces and nephews!

So things around here have been going at about a 100 miles an hour it seems like.  Stephen has one activity after another, we've been so blessed with family and friends in town, and the twin are now up more then they are asleep during the day!

Me and my godson JR! I love this kid (and so does Stephen)

But in the middle of all of this I'm having to make some major decisions about children!!  What to do, what to do - see Jude has decided that he really doesn't like to sleep :( He wants to, but when you put him down he gets rather fussy - this makes for very frustrating encounters in the wee hours of the night. 

silly Hanlon

On top of that, I'm getting that inch that they are getting to big to share a crib any more, our room is getting to small for the pack n play, and they are getting sensitive to light and noise while they are sleeping - so no tv or reading if their in there with us. 

cute cousins watching a movie!

Ok, so all of that being said I have to ask myself what do we do?  I really am not ready for Abby to move out of her crib (but I just might not have control over that anymore) and the thought of moving another crib into that nursery and another bed into Stephen's room just makes me feel claustrophobic!  I can't imagine someone buying our house with the room packed to the brim - plus I just really feel like the second we move everything in is the day we finally sell this house!

Cousin Kristen getting her baby fix :) Cecilia is really enjoying it!!

So with all that being said - what do you think?  I wish I could be better at making some of these decisions, but sometimes I just need a sounding board.  (I also am getting a feeling of what I'm going to do just by typing it all out)

Abby with two of her cousins, they were loving playing together!!

 anyone have any thoughts on getting Jude to just go to sleep? :)  What about selling your house with a handful of kids involved? 



Stephen and JR - fighting buddies (they had so much fun being "rough" together) Alan now thinks Stephen's roughness is a genetic thing and he gets it from my side :) LOL

                                   Any thoughts on how to keep my sanity while being just a bit tired?

Sweet Tate, he loved the babies!!

So I know we are at a changing point here in the Maddox household - I just don't know if I'm ready for my sweet Abby to be a big girl just yet and at the same time I'm ready to get those sweet babies to sleep a little bit more :)  Tell me what you think, I'd love to hear from anyone, even if it's just a hello I'm thinking about you!